Everybody's Free (to Drink Prune Juice)
by Silver1
Summary: A small parody that comes from crossing the song "Everybody's Free (to Wear Sunscreen)" with Digimon Adventure.


Everybody's Free (To Drink Prune-Juice)

Everybody's Free (To Drink Prune-Juice)

by Silver

*Disclaimer: I don't own any rights to Digimon, at all. Nor do I own rights to the song on which this fic is based. All rights for "Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) belong to Baz Luhrmann and his associates.*

Author's note: This is a small attempt at humor through a song parody. You might not fully understand it unless you've heard "Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) by Baz Luhrmann. It's a funny, and, in some ways, very profound song. I hope you enjoy it, and I hope it's funny. 

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Digidestined of Digimon Adventure 01 and 02, drink Prune Juice.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, prune-juice would be it. The long-term benefits of prune juice have been proven by Cody's grandfather, where as the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own demented mind.

I will dispense this advice…………………………………..now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth.

  
No, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until episode 50.

But trust me, during the summer, your fans will look back at old reruns and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before the series and how fabulous you really looked.

Your heads are fatter than humanly possible.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to force your partner into digivolving to Ultimate.

The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never happen in real life. The kind of things that some twisted writer thinks up in a darkened room.

Do one thing every day that scares you (like kissing a Sukamon). 

Sing like Mimi does.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with Kari when she's reckless with Davis'. 

Bath communally. 

Don't waste your time on love triangles. 

Sometimes you're a dinosaur, sometimes you're a wolf. Digivolving is hard, and in the end, you go back to being yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell Davis how.

Keep your old digivices. Throw away your tags and crests.

Eat.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what to do with your life. The writers will decide that for you.

Some of the most interesting jobs involve going to Mars.

Get plenty of naps.

Be kind to your hair. You'll miss it when it's cut.

Maybe you'll marry another Digidestined, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have clone children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll get a Mega, maybe your Digimon will only have one evolution sequence. 

Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. That's for the fans to do!

Enjoy your Digimon. Digivolve it anyway you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it. It is the greatest partner you'll ever have.

Karaoke, even if you have nowhere to do it but the Gekomon castle. 

Read the spoilers, even if you don't believe them.

Do not read bashing fics. They will only make you feel stupid. 

Get to know your parents. The show doesn't list them all.

Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to past traumas, and the people most likely to glow at inopportune times. 

Understand that friends come and go, but fistfights keep things interesting. 

Work hard to bridge the gaps in dimensions and seasons, because the older you get, the more you'll become a second-rate character. 

Live in New York City once, but leave before you start to talk like Michael.

Live in China once, but leave before the Poi brothers develop a crush on you. 

Travel on Imperialdramon.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Matt and Sora are probably married, TK and Kari aren't, only Kenyako became truly official. 

But some fans will deny that and say Matt and Sora divorced, TK and Kari married, and that everyone has to think their way.

Respect your dubbers. Don't expect anyone else to (especially me).

Maybe you'll have a bat-pig. Maybe you'll have a worm partner. But you never know when either will die and come back.

Don't mess around with your hair or you'll lose half your fans.

Be careful with whose advice you get, they're mostly just flames. 

Guest shots are a form of nostalgia. Having them is a way of fishing 01 from the disposal, wiping it off, aging the characters, and recycling them for more than they're worth.

But trust me on the prune juice. 

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Author's Note: This seemed funnier when I was actually writing it. Maybe I'm just not a comedian. 

At least I got this fic out on my anniversary! As of today, September 26, 2001, I have been an author at FF.net for one whole year. Good for me!!!

Anyway, I hope you guys found that to be at least a little amusing. Please review and let me know what you think. 


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